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I don't know if it's art, but it eats brains

Posted on 2008.10.26 at 03:58
Zombie Haiku:

The Halloween countdown continues with my pick for the year's best contribution to Halloween humor, aka "The award for most brains consumed in a single evening."  It's a twisted little book called "Zombie Haiku" which is a first person account of a man's rapid degeneration, after he is infected by a zombie.  The descent is told through a chronological series of Haiku (sadly, not always true to form), but I laughed until my guts fell out and snorted my maggoty brains across the pages.   While I'm on the subject, here's a bit of zombie trivia--the pop-culture notion that zombies crave human brains, as opposed to hungering for human flesh in general, didn't become part of zombie lore until it appeared in the 1985 movie, "Return of the Living Dead," written by Dan O'Bannon--yes, the same O'Bannon who wrote Ridley Scott's "Alien."    Brain-craving, as zombie fans know,  is not part of Romero's undead canon.  The brilliant zombie books of Brian Keene and Max Brooks have gone back to the earlier concept of humanity as a shrieking smorgasbord.

Here's a few choice cuts from the "Zombie Haiku" book.  Shamble over to a bookstore and pick up a copy.

ZOMBIE HAIKU
 
(Existential Zombie--a day in the life)
 
Everything I thought
tastes like chicken
really tastes like man.

There is something fun
about that soft popping sound
when biting fat calves.

The other dead guy
stares at me with a blank look
as we softly moan.

I can see his tongue
move through the hole in his face
that isn't his mouth.
 
I know he can't see
because the room is pitch black
and I have his eyes.*
 
  
(The nursing home)
 
My instinct steers me
to my gourmet dinner feast
a nursing home.
 
Little old ladies
speed away in their wheelchairs,
frightened meals-on-wheels.
 

(Homecoming--shudder--so wrong in so many ways!)
 
I remember home
and I remember my mom,
and her meaty thighs.
 
I loved my momma,
I eat her with my mouth closed,
how she would want it.
 
*My personal favorite
 
All Haiku taken from the book, "Zombie Haiku" by Ryan Mecum, copyright 2008

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